yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
People in love make me want to vomit
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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