Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
