OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
