Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
