did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize