awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
