The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
