The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
