I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
The Olympian is in my bed
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
