He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize