I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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