I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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