my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
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She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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