Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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