your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
