he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
