The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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