Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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