I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
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was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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