I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize