I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
