honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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