I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
did i just pee glitter
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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