her vagine was all disorganized.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
