Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
3pm strippers are depressing
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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