Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
