i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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