yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
My bed smells like the plague
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
