He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
