and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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