belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
