eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
