I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize