We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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