I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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