I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
