Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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