I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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