Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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