Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
50% drunk capacity currently
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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