So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
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