these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
