Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
