I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
