So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
