But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
