Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
These tits shall not be calmed
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
