Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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