grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Randomize