2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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