FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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